Have you ever spent a lot of time planning something and feeling confident about how it would unfold? But as you began to execute the plan things suddenly veered in a different direction… and you’re like a deer in the headlights, “Wait.. what.. How… But I thought…”
That’s how I felt about the call to serve as a pastor. That was definitely not the plan. I was supposed to be the Pastor’s wife, cheerleader and administrator. I knew I would rock the role. So imagine my confusion when I heard the call of God for me to serve alongside my husband as a pastor too. “Wait.. Say what now, Lord?”
But the call was as clear as it was frightening. Some people embrace change. I find change scary but once I take the plunge, I’m all in. So although pastoring is not the path I would have chosen for myself, I chose to be obedient.
Unfortunately, the title of Pastor is a little intimidating to some. People feel they have to be on their Ps and Qs. I see faces instantly morph, and eyes become guarded when people learn that Denielle is really Pastor Denielle. For some reason, the title makes people think twice about what they say. But pastor is just a title. It is not an identity. I am simply Denielle.
As a counselor before embracing the title of pastor, I was accustomed to people freely gravitating and opening up to me, so these defenses were a challenge. Thankfully, people quickly learn that I don’t fit the pastor stereotype anyway.
I like to think that my superpower is my authenticity. Somebody said to me recently, “Girl, you real, real.” Like everyone else, I have days when I feel like a hot mess express and that’s okay. I think that when people see that leaders don’t have it all together all the time, and we’re daily reliant on God’s grace and forgiveness like everyone else, we’re more relatable. It helps to foster more genuine connections. And that’s what I want.
I like to say that I am becoming… I have not arrived, but I am enjoying the journey of becoming the woman that God created me to be. I am intentional about transformation for me and for others. Transformation always comes with a side of pain. Even Jesus learned obedience by the things he suffered. But by yielding every pain to the Father, we can pivot from pain to praise to purpose.
As a pastor, coach, writer, counselor, Founder of The Priceless Foundation For Women and co-owner of Safe Place Family Life Enrichment Centre ltd helping people through their transformation brings me immense satisfaction. I am grateful for the opportunity to partner with God and his children to see them reach their full potential.
Don’t get it twisted though… sometimes the emotional weight of this vocation is heavy. But I have learnt to be intentional about what I do. I give one hundred percent to my work when I’m in work mode. And when I’m in wife and mama bear mode, I’m fully there too. Learning how to say no without feeling guilty changed my life. Ladies, try it – you cannot be everything to everybody all the time.
Don’t try to fit in someone else’s shoes. Rock your own shoes. There is power in simply being you. Don’t compete. Don’t compare. Don’t complain. Just complete the mission God gave you with courage, boldness and your unique style.
Written by Denielle Palcide
Trinidad and Tobago